In Which I Get Away With "The Girl Who Was Born Dead" Before Book Launch Day
A Getaway and Upcoming Events First Announced Here
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A Getaway
When your kids are little, you never know the “last” of something. The last time they’ll be too big for you to pick up and carry in your arms. The last time they’ll run up and hug you in public. The last time you’ll hold their hand. The last time they’ll lean their little heads on you.
I don’t recall the lasts—I more easily remember the firsts. We often don’t know when these lasts will occur. But it is easier to remember the first words. The first steps. The first laughs. We don’t know the lasts, and we keep generating new firsts. Life keeps going, kids keep growing. We all keep changing. Nothing stays the same for too long.
And so it happened when I had a girl, some years ago, she grew up. “The Girl Who Was Born Dead” is what she wrote when she was in high school for a speech. She wrote about her life, her birth, her story. She was—and is— my firstborn, and yes, she was born dead. But she survived. And more than survived—she thrived. She has a story all her own. And I have my own story of it, as a mother.
So this girl has overcome some adversity, some hardship. Though life handed her some hard, she didn’t run from the hard. She faced it, walked through it. She even chose hard things. I don’t know anyone who works as hard she does. And I’m her biggest cheerleader.
So this girl of mine has been studying and working hard. She’s about to graduate medical school and recently matched for residency. (Big happy news!) And well, just after finishing her last school assignment, just a few weeks ago, she and a friend embarked on an adventure. They hiked to Everest Base Camp. It turned out to be an 11-day hike, covering over 60 miles, reaching 18,000 feet. She trained for months and she and her friend did it!
So before my girl runs off again, before she starts her residency program, before she gets busy, I asked for a slot in her busy schedule. I asked for a little time. I had never taken a trip with just her, just the two of us. I wanted just the two of us, just a little time with this admirable, brave young woman. She did so, though it was just after she returned from her Everest trip and was still recovering. She made it happen. For me.
So we took off for a few days. Destination: Arizona. Years ago, on a family vacation to the Grand Canyon, we wanted to go to Antelope Canyon, but we didn’t know you had to reserve a time spot in advance. So we missed that. And we saw Horseshoe Bend via a river raft, which was fun. But we didn’t see it from the top, where you can see the bend from a bird’s eye perspective.
So we decided to make a trip to Arizona to see Antelope Canyon, Horseshoe Bend from the top, and do some hiking. It was just 5 days, 2 days of it travel, and 3 days there. But it was good to have time alone with the girl who made me a mom. Even though we are in the midst of busy weeks. She’s got to got ready for residency, find a new place to live, wind things down, do some freelance work to save money. And I’m gearing up for book launch. I had to keep checking (and posting) on social media while I was gone, which annoyed me, and my online book launch group opened while I was gone. I didn’t particularly want to do that, but the timing was such that I had to. It seems now not the best time with all we have going on, but is it really the best time for anything? We can’t plan for so much of life; we just have to make the best of the time we have.
It was the only time to make it happen. We make do. We make the best of it. So we both had things to keep checking on, work to do, etc. But I had a dream of taking a trip with just my daughter, something I had never done in all these years. I could spend some hours asking myself why had I never done this, but it wouldn’t help. I can do it now. I know a trip isn’t mandatory. But I really desired something special.
We did some hiking, eating, and sleeping. The weather was perfection, with blue skies. It was time spent appreciating the beauty of the outdoors, the vastness of the landscape, the unusual topography in northern Arizona, with hills and deserts and warm winds. And, on the last day, I got to see one of my cousins that I hadn’t seen in years who lives there! A blessing, and I’m grateful.
Here are a few photos (Antelope Canyon, Horseshoe Bend, Mescal Trail in Sedona, Toadstools trail in Utah, Navajo cliff dwellings in Walnut Canyon, cacti in Phoenix, blooming Prickly Pear)
Book Launch Day Approaches
The big day, meaning, book launch day approaches soon! That day is April 16. My new book will be in the world in just a few weeks. And this week, the online book launch group is open! You’ve been with me on this journey, and I’m so grateful to you, dear readers, and I’d love to share this with you. This is a private group for just book launch members. As a way of saying thank you, I’ll be having gift card giveaways, videos with me, my free chai recipe download as a preorder bonus, early access to the book, and more. The launch group runs 4 weeks, and we ask you that you please write a review on Amazon and Goodreads. The book launch group signup will be open until March 28. You can read more and join by clicking here. It’s no small thing you’re here with me. And these little things (giveaways, preorder gifts, etc.) are a little way of saying a big thank you for your support. ♥️
This book is about the experience of being different, of being a minority, of what it feels like to be the only one like you in a room, in a space. It defines the experience of being othered, marginalized, alone, about the identity conflicts we experience when we have to give up parts of ourselves and can’t be who we are. It’s about the ache but also the gifts of this kind of loneliness. This isn’t a hopeless place. It’s a place of abundance. I hope, if you’ve been in this space as I have, that you find this to be true for you also, and the words in this book make you feel seen and offer some words of hope and healing.
Right now, IVP has a special for the rest of March for books written by women, in honor of Women’s History month, with 20% off and free shipping with the code IVPWHM24. Click here to preorder.
Upcoming Events
Upcoming events are below, where you can catch me in person or online. Most of these have not been announced to the public yet! You’re the first to know. : )
April 1-26, Online Book Launch Group
April 16, Moody Radio, Live interview, 2pm
April 23, Live TV interview, TJM4
April 26, Book Launch Event at Boswell Books (in-person, free, register here)
May 5, Book reading, conversation, and signing, Art Gallery (in-person)
Various podcast episodes coming soon
A first trip with my daughter. Hopefully not the last. There are more firsts and lasts coming. Every day is a first. Every morning is a new first. And every day holds the possibility of more firsts and lasts. The possibility of good. Of hardships. Of blessing. Of sorrow. Which is why we live the most, the fullest, with the knowledge of each day holding the firsts and the lasts. And the unknowables. Why do we assume the worst with the unknowables when they could very well be something of the very best? We don’t know what’s around the bend, but we do know both joy and sorrow coexist, holding hands, encircling our lives. It’s in the dailiness of it all, isn’t it? The daily, simple, things. We live most of our lives in the simple, mundane, daily things that we tend to forget. But so many of the firsts and lasts are there, just as in the bigger moments.
What firsts and lasts are you embracing today?
Peace,
Beautiful, and congratulations to your daughter!